Remember those "What's Wrong with This Picture" challenges in the children's magazine Highlights? And then there was that fabulous Andrew Gold album of the same name with a treasure trove of "wrongs" on the cover.
I couldn't help thinking of both as I held a Direct Mail piece from Anytime Fitness that arrived in yesterday's mail (click image to enlarge).
First...do I want a slim but buxom bikini body? OK...I guess I do, but will most guys make the connection? Strike One.
The copy states: "Become a member...and in just weeks feel and look your best." But, if I'm 400 lbs and haven't worked out since high school, will I REALLY feel and look my best in just weeks? Strike Two (and, dude, you need some commas).
But even better than that is the disclaimer: "Terms and conditions apply. No hidden gimmicks."
If there are no hidden gimmicks, then there shouldn't be ANY terms or conditions, Sparky. Strike Three.
And finally, "Please see club manager for details. You won't regret it."
But...what if I do? What if the club manager turns out to be a tool? Strike Four.
The return address is from a firm outta Alabama called Smart Market.